Helping the Oppressor
The Prophet (peace be upon him) said, "Help your brother whether he is an
oppressor or an oppressed," A man said, "O Allah's Apostle! I will help him
if he is oppressed, but if he is an oppressor, how shall I help him?" The
Prophet said, "By preventing him from oppressing (others), for that is how
to help him ." Sahih Bukhari Hadith No. 84 Book 85, Volumune 009 Narrated by Anas (r.a.)
How hypocritical are we being?
'm going to make the generalized statment that we all here to do some sort of "development", whatever that means to each of us. Development to me means equitable access for all, justice in the minor things and acts of life and positive peace. But how do we expect to "preach" the ideals of justice and equitable access when we, ourselves, fail to imbibe them by virtue of our economically-priveleged lifestyle.
Reflection- not liking what I see in the mirror
Ever had one of those times when you get the nasty realization that you've left all the ideals you wanted to strive by?
Having one of those times, and not happy by what I see in the mirror.
Ever since leaving Pakistan, I promised that I would never get to that state of numbness where unjustice, unfairness and lack of equitable access doesn't bother me. But, it's *very* easy to pretend; not so easy in reality.
I'm sure I've written before about the frustrating difference of lifestyles between the volunteers/expats and that of the locals. I've also written before about how it's almost impossible to extend relations past a certain point with the locals, simply because I feel too guilty inviting them to my flash house. Well, next problem in this consequence: if I am unable to develop meaningful relationships with locals, other fellow volunteers are the next logical step. Now, the Australian volunteers get a very similar compensation package to the Canadians; PeaceCorps are the odd-ball-out but we'll discuss them later. Since it is *very* hard to resist the temptation to spend, esp. when in a group setting, most of the volunteer get-togethers end up taking place at expensive expat-owned coffee shops and eating places.
So, while looking back at my experience here so far, turns out that I've done nothing but eat out at fancy places, spend money on things I would've never been able to afford back home and find those past-times acceptable and rational which I would have ridiculed back in Canada. As I said earlier, not a pretty picture. And very disheartening if this is the kind of thing you imagined yourself doing for the rest of your life, in order to somehow reverse all the unfair privlege you were afforded in life.
But this dilemma continues: if I don't want to go crazy talking to the walls and have any sort of non-superficial social interaction, my only option is the volunteer social circle. However, needless to say that a lot of volunteers don't hold the same opinions and ideals of self-conduct as myself, esp. if they've been here for a bit longer (explanation: since newbie's are usually more enthusiastic than the more experienced). So, no matter how hard I try, I still find myself participating in activities that I would've, idealistically, been opposed to.
*PeaceCorps: So, I said we'd talk about the PeaceCorps later, and this is *later*. The PeaceCorps program is a bit different: they barely get *any* money as a monthly stipend. If I'm correct, something as limited as $200! In all fairness, they aren't starving since their food, housing and transport is usually cared for by the sponsoring community or host organization. But still, lack of this extra money helps to make sure that they atleast have to try living the same lifestyle as the host country nationals. What's more is that they are often placed in seperate villages or communities, or atleast have to *live* alone, which basically forces them to interact more with the locals rather than merely staying in their volunteer/expat-dominated social circles. While there are issues I have with certain goals or ideologies behind the PeaceCorps program, I have to say I am *very* much in approval of their financial/accomodation package; a bit "intense" as I've heard other volunteers say, but in my opinion, the end experience of the volunteer *and* the host communtiy is well worth this general disapproval from the volunteer community.
Self-improvement projects
So, since there is tonnes of free time here, I've decided to embark on a few self-improvement projects, the top priority going to reading books(religious and non-religious ) and not being an absolute disaster when it comes to domestic chores. I decided that sewing (which, I finally realized, is pronoucned as "sowing" and not "see-wing") is going to be included in my latter list. So I went to the local market where mamas, as married women are referred to in Vanuatu, usually sew and sell clothes to tourists.
**This conversation takes place in Bislama*
Me: Can you teach me how to sew?
Lady: *Laughs and gives me a high five*
(We talk about other thigns for a few minutes. All this while I'm trying to figure out a different way of asking the question, incase I didn't make sense the first time around or said something other than what was intended.)
Me: If me and a few other volunteers pay you, can you be my teacher? (I ask this with a bit of over-confidence, since I'm sure I've figured out the fool-proof way of saying the question in Bislama, without giving the wrong meaning.)
LadY: *laughs again and gives me a high five again*
Me: *Smiles, sighs and walks away*
These are the two explanations I came up with:
- I said something completely different in Bislama than what was intended
- She didn't understand that I was willing to pay for classes
*meh* Atleast I tried (I guess)
Australia Day
Fact of the day: Jan 26, 2007 is Australia Day!
What is Australia Day you ask? Well, that is the day white man landed on, and claimed, Australia as their land.
I have been told that it is also referred to as the "Day of Mourning" by 2% of the Australian population!
A quote from a fellow-Aussie volunteer who threw a get-together @ her place to commemorate the event:
australia is one of the only countries (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/National_holiday) who celebrates the day the land was invaded with nationalistic pride, rather than celebrate, say, independence, or the signing of an all inclusive constitution or treaty.
While signing off her email, She referred to it as "Invasion Day"
Palestine vs. Pakistan
I'm sure I've written about the entire "no, where are you *really* from" situation I have to go through on a daily basis. It's only annoying when other volunteers or wealthy tourists display the narrow-mindedness; I don't mind when the Ni-Vans ask this, since they will still say the name of their village of origin, even if they've lived in Vila for a good 8 years or so.
But, it's a bit confusing on how to respond when, on being told that I'm originally from Pakistan, people think that I'm referring to Palestine. First few times I tried explaining, in my broken-Bislama, that Palestine and Pakistan are two different countries, even though violence is present in both. But that they probably heard about Palestine in the news, and not Pakistan.
But, things get a bit tricky since confrontation or aggression is strongly disliked in the Melanesian culture (or that's what I've been told); so, any form of overt disagreement amounts to agression as well. So, if you spend too much time explaining the details and explaining your personal political opinions, than you are probably coming across as confrontational. But, if you don't correct the misunderstanding, than you are loosing an amazing opportunity to explain a major difference and tell them the other side of teh story that is not broadcasted on television news.
A lot of times the dialogue ends up going like this:
Other: You blo wea (where are you from)?
Me: Originally, from Pakistan, but I'm here as a Canadian volunteer. So I've been living in Canada with my family for 7 years.
Other: Oh, Pakistan!? I gat fullap fighting! (Pakistan! It has too much fighting)
Me: *nodding head with slight resignation* Yes, fullap violence.
Have to say though, it took me a good month to figure out the fact that people were confusing Pakistan with Palestine; imagine my bewilderment before then, when receiving the "fullap fighting" commment.
Counterpart..
So, my counterpart's pregnant! This comes as a bit of shock, since she's going on maternity leave in a week and now, we have to try and squish in a tonne of meetings in the next few days since I also found out that, at the same time, that I will be covering for her, as the Provincial Women's Development Officer, while she's gone for three months. *eek!*
While she doesn't complain at *all* about being 8-months-pregnant (therefore the shock on being told), her pregnancy does have one side-effect: she's super-sleepy. So, she'll sit infront of the computer to work, but then doze off.. which I understand, but the only glitch is that there is only one computer that both her and myself are sharing. This is also the very computer that I run trainings on for the 20+ staff, and the very PC that other staff, who don't have acess to equipment, come practice on. So competition for computer usage is cut-throat already. I haven't been running trainings for this entire week, simply because too much paper/planning work was piling up, and I thought I'd take this week to deal with all that; also, being used to luxury of unlimited computer access, I started an electronic version (Rather than hard copy) of all my documents, and it only makes sense to continue updating them whenever needed.
Well, hasn't worked out the exact way I was hoping for it to since my coutnerpart will invariably arrive before me (yes, I've started being late *even* in this culture) and while using the computer, will doze off. And then I spend the next two to three hours trying to figure out whether it would be culturally-insensitive and/or in-emphathetic of me to poke her in the arm, and ask her to sleep on a chair that is not directly in front of the computer. It's been three days since this has been going on; I stil haven't been able to muster up the guts to wake up a pregnant lady who is, unfortuantely, sleeping in front of the only computer that is shared between 5+ staff members. LOL
Edit: It's been suggested by fellow volunteers that if she's sitting on a rolley-chair, than I simply roll her away when she fals asleep. So, the action plan from now on is (1) To get a rolley-chair and (2) make sure it's always placed in front of the computer. :P
Computer
(Story of how I got a computer 1 month into my placement, just incase I needed it to do computer training!)**Conversation with S.G. aka "The Boss" during my second week of work**
Me: So, I wanted to have this meeting with you to see what kind of goals you wanted me to achieve while I'm here
Secretary General: Hmm..
[long pause]
Mo: SO, my placement description says that I'm an IT Training Officer...
SG: Yes, we want to do computer training
Me: Yes, Yes, can be done absolutely.
[long pause, again]
SG: Ok, so when are you starting?
Me: Well, I can start right away, it's just taht I would need access to atleast one working computer for training purposes
SG: Oh.
[long pause X 3]
SG: So, why don't you write up a proposal saying why you need a computer, what kind of computer, and when you need it
Me: Umm, well, I need the computer because I need to do computer training, and I can't start trainings without it
SG: Okay.
Me: So?
SG: Write up a proposal
*Being the keener that we all are in the first few weeks of the job, I draft up the proposal that very afternoon, submit it and get it signed by the SG that very day as well. Only problem is that the Accountant decides that I don't necessarily *need* a computer, so he doesn't give me the money to buy the computer.*
**Conversation with "The Boss" during my fourth week of work**
Me: *It's Friday, and I'm getting ready to leave for the day*
SG: Good Afternoon FATI! (He can't say my name, so came up with his own short form. I think I can live with this alteration, rather than "khatima" or "fat-ma")
Me: *I smile, while trying to make sure my lips don't get stuck in the braces; fail in my attempt so get out a fumbled "Good Afternoon" while trying to bring my lips back to their natural state)
SG: You need a computer?
ME: *still struggling with getting my lips/gums/skin unhooked frmo the gazillion hooks in the braces* Um, what?
SG: You need a computer?
Me: Yes, yes, .. I would. If you want me to do computer training, than a computer would be somewhat helpful
SG: Here *hands me a wad of cash, equal to $400 CAN*
Me: Um.. *confused, because I don't realize he's handing me money*
SG: Go buy a comptuer
Me: *looks down, realizes its $$$, but confused* Okay..?
SG: You need anything else, you let me know.
Me: *smiles* Um, okay.
So, now, I have a computer! :) I no longer have to teach people what a comptuer *would* look like, had it been sitting on the table next to us. Yay! :P
