Torn
Once again, completey torn.. completely @ unrest emotionally and spiritually. Things have been great in Vanuatu; absolutely, positively great. No hurdles, no problems what so ever. Still, I have this nagging feeling.. of contempt for this experience.CUSO's mission statement states that they work towards a number of famous causes, such as social justice yada yada yada but also, self-determination and cultural vitality. Sounds great, and as my supervisor likes to put it, "radical." But this is certainly VERY hard for me to come to terms with; am I necessarily arguing that all differences and diversity within cultures should be erased? Absolutely not! But what I am confused about is this: how can I, a Muslim who does believe in the fact that there is only one God and that other kinds of pagan religions are not an acceptable way of living, commit myself to cultural stability when a culture is built around witchcraft and the practice of black-bagic?
Oh, don't misunderstand me at all: I am, in no way, in favour of the extreme changes bought about by the missionaries in the colonized world, when they, themselves, were very inaccruate in their interpretations and application of the holy text. But, how do you come to terms and accept something as undoubtedly-unacceptable as pig sacrifice. Pigs are a VERY big part of the cultural tradition here in Melanesia: they are offered as sacrifice to chiefs and dieties, they are used as gifts and currency during feasts and marriages. At the same time, there is no doubt or disagreement between the Islamic scholars on the sin attached with consuming pig.
I can (and will) continue to not eat pig; but am I wrong to not be stopping others from this consumption? If yes, and if I do **try** to stop them, than won't I be becoming a cultural imperialist, the very thing that I have come to assist in resisting!
Our pre-departure orientation was full with loads and loads of info about cultural shock and the hurdles in cultural adaptation; seemed simple enough as, according to me, "I was constantly living that reality even while in Canada." But is this what they meant? Placements are supposed to make you re-think your past assumptions and beliefs, but can that ever *?*really** happen when I already have a belief system that I am strongly dedicated to?
posted by faa-T @ 12:50 PM
3 Comments:
(I miss talking like an old lady sometimes, hence this post):
fati dear,
thanks for sharing your wonderful experiences with the world. Oh my, they just sound so beautiful. I hope you continue to enjoy your time there, and learn some more Bislama. remember to stay safe dear, and we love you always..the kids say they're missing you lots.
end of that.
I hear your struggle, and the only suggestion I'd have is that it's exactly the same struggle that the Prophet (saw) had to face. He was alone in a community where idol-worshipping, burying daughters alive, strange rituals, superstitious beliefs, abusing slaves were common place.
fati, he spent 40 years in the culture without compromising his own morals. spent 40 years before even began to invite to the good and forbid the evil..and even when his mission started, he only started with the ones that were closest to him.
so take things easy, know that it is hard for you to see something that's grossly wrong and not be able to say much, but honestly, like you realize, you can't do that much: if you try to go into every public place and announce your disgust at their practices, people will only get defensive and will never want to listen.
because these customs have been built upon for centuries, they're ingrained into people's lives, they haven't seen anything else, and so the thought that they may be wrong won't even cross their mind.
Like you're already doing, work at integrating into the culture while upholding your morals, and when people are comfortable enough, you can begin to creatively make your point...think Ibrahim (as).
Islam is supposed to be universal, not a one-faced religion, and everywhere it reflects the culture, so just by taking part in those customs that are compatible with Islam and staying away from those that aren't, you're naturally going to invite questions..naturally going to make a powerful statement.
also, yes pork is haraam but that's only a very minor part of the faith right...I think if you focus on those rituals that are clearly shirk and use those as a way to invite to the central message of Islam: the belief in the oneness of God, it would help focus your efforts in one direction.
Also, give yourself a break. You're doing a fantastic job representing, mashaAllah..it is not an easy task breaking down so many barriers to get to where you're at, and remember you're expected to make mistakes, you're only human.
take care,
fezzik
********HAPPY BIRTHDAY*********
Hope you have a great time. I know this is very different than all the birthdays you have so far but try to enjoy this change, compare, analyze and appreciate what you are given.
An additional advise, life is never easy it has so many faces and so many directions.Especially when you at a verge, decisons are extremely difficult. But look at the bright side, you are where you desperately wanted to be, you are having first hand experience of all your dreams. To weigh up the pros and cons and to reach to a conclusion can be left for later.
ENJOY THE DAY AND TIME AT THE MOMENT. TAKE IN AS MUCH AS YOU CAN. TRY TO KEEP YOURSELF HAAPY. ONLY YOU CAN DO IT.
Again have a great day, take your friends out for some strange sweet (i guess u can't expect a cake so meat sprinkle with sugar might be the order of the day,...JOKE..)
*********HAPPY BIRTHDAY***********
Thank you for the comments. Please know that I am reading them, even if I fail to reply to them individually.
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